Title: Drinking tea made from guinea pig poop or surviving a tween birthday party
Author: Christie Barnes
Date: Sunday, September 05, 2010
Article:

Surviving in the Gobi Desert, drinking boiled guinea pig poop for tea---or---chaperoning a tween girl hotel sleepover party.  Which is more stressful and worrying making.  I am arranging to be air dropped in the middle of the Aussie outback next year than chaperone another girl’s overnight birthday party.

Viewing the ten-year-olds from my connecting room was like observing their behavior in a fish tank or lab setting.  There was not a stress-free fun moment except when they went to sleep.

They all had iPhones.  How?  I don't have an iPhone.  One mom wanted her daughter to call every 2 hours but no one told me.  The mom called me, furious after 4 hours of party wondering what was going on with her daughter.  You mean the ten year old sticking gum to the Hyatt wall? 

They were nice kids but would sell their soul not to be left alone for more than 30 seconds.  This need for a best friend and popularity show just how immature our little Twilight enamoured tweens are.  Ten is not eighteen or twenty.

Take heart.  Girls get into 75% less serious trouble than boys.  Teen girls wear seatbelts and don't usually succeed in committing suicide...but the heart-ache we parents feel watching them learn 'self-esteem'.